On His Grave Page 8

  “I had to say something, sweetheart. I’m your mum, and it’s my job to make sure you’re safe.”

  “I don’t want to get in more trouble.”

  She stopped, pulling him to a halt with her, and crouched to his level. “You’re not in trouble. Not even one little bit, okay?”

  He pressed his lips together and nodded, but she could see he was worried, and it broke her heart. Fucking Felix.

  She rose to standing again, and together they walked back to the house. As she approached the gate, she saw something and let out a little ‘oh’ of surprise.

  Ollie had noticed it, too. “Your pots are back together!”

  Her mouth dropped open, and she stepped into her front garden, taking in the sight of the pretty plant pots with the bedding plants of pinks and whites and yellows spilling out of them.

  Movement came at the side of the house, and Haiden walked around from the back yard, brushing his hands off on the backs of his jeans. He stopped short when he saw her standing there.

  “Oh, hi.”

  “Did you do this?” she asked.

  He shrugged, and gave a half smile, his cheeks pinkening in a way that was nothing short of adorable. “It’s nothing, really.”

  “It’s not nothing. I can’t remember the last time someone did something so nice for me.” Stupidly, after her stressful day, and the worries about Ollie and Felix, she found her eyes filling with tears. She pinched her lips and shook her head, trying to hold herself off from crying.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, quickly stepping forward, touching her elbow with the tips of his fingers. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “No, you didn’t, honestly. There’s just been some stuff going on at school with that boy not being very nice to Ollie, and I’ve been stressing out about it all. This is such a lovely surprise that you’ve made me a little emotional.”

  “It shouldn’t be that way, Kristen,” he said, lifting his blue gaze to hers. “You should have people in your life who want to do nice things for you.”

  She glanced away, embarrassed. “It’s just me and Ollie, really. And I’m okay with that, most of the time.”

  She couldn’t allow herself to get used to having him around. It was a dangerous route to go down. They were already a week into his twelve-week stay, and once those twelve weeks were up, he would go back to his life in Sweden. Then she would have someone different come and live with her, and that person could be a whole different experience to how Haiden was.

  Trouble was, she already thought she was going to miss him when he was gone.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Kristen bent to scoop the mail off the front mat. She never liked picking up the post. There was never anything good in it, always just more bills or bank statements telling her how low her funds were.

  She rifled through the letters and paused at one. It didn’t look like all the others. It was written on a plain white envelope, rather than one with that little cellophane see-through window or with the stamp of a utility company or something recognisable on it.

  With her heart fluttering, she quickly tore open the letter. Better to get these things done and out of the way than to ignore it and hope it just went away. It never did. She pulled out the letter and frowned down, recognising the header. It was the solicitors Steven had used during their divorce settlement. She’d seen that letter header often enough over the last few years. What the hell could they be writing to her about now? Everything had been settled during the divorce. Quickly, she scanned the contents of the letter. What the fuck?

  The words hit her like a bolt to the heart, and her mouth dropped open. Due to a change in circumstances, Stephen was requesting to change the access set up. It read that he was no longer comfortable with Ollie spending as much time in her home and that he was seeking longer access hours.

  In disbelief, Kristen barked out laughter. How the fuck did Steven think he had the rights to longer access hours when he didn’t even show up for the ones he currently had? She shook with anger. This was all about Haiden staying here, she didn’t doubt it. And her rebuttal of Stephen’s hints that he wanted to get back together the other day probably hadn’t helped. He had no intention of spending more time with Ollie—she would have encouraged it if he had. No, this was all about upsetting her and making sure she knew her place.

  Though she wanted to screw up the letter and throw it in Steven’s face, she knew she needed to keep hold of any paperwork. This was about protecting her and Ollie as much as anything else. She stormed into the kitchen where she’d left her mobile phone on the side and snatched it up. With a shaking hand, she pulled up Steven’s number and hit the call button.

  Within two rings, he answered. “So, I assume you got the letter from my solicitor?”

  She didn’t miss the smug tone to his voice. “Yes, I did, and you can shove it where the sun doesn’t shine. I mean, how fucking ridiculous can you get? You don’t even show up when you’re supposed to have him, and now you’re expecting to see Ollie more often. You are having a laugh. What you’re basically asking for is more opportunities to let our son down.”

  “That’s not it at all,” he said. “I’ve spoken to Lisa, and she’s agreed that it might be easier if Ollie is here more often. That way he’ll get used to being in his bed here, and things won’t be so difficult.”

  She laughed again. “Oh, is this the same Lisa that you said to me the other week you were having second thoughts about? The same Lisa you now have a baby with and who you were thinking of dumping to come running back to me?”

  “That’s not what I said at all.” His voice was sharp. “You’re twisting things around. Making them up in your head, just like you always did.”

  “Don’t try to bullshit me, Stephen,” she snapped. “I’m not susceptible to your little games anymore. And I never twisted things around in my head all those years ago. I was paranoid for a fucking good reason. You were sleeping around on me the entire time I was stuck at home with a new baby, feeling shit about myself.”

  They’d had this argument so many times, she didn’t even know why she was letting the words come out of her mouth. The fight wouldn’t make any difference. He would always make her think everything was her fault. And it wasn’t as though she even wanted him back. He could keep his cheating self to himself.

  “Actually,” she said, “I feel sorry for Lisa, because I was her once upon a time, and I know exactly how it feels to have a new baby and have you eyeing up other women who look like better options.”

  Stephen laughed. “See, you’re making things up in your head again. I’m not doing any of those things. Lisa is perfectly fine and happy.”

  She snorted down the phone. “That’s not what you said to me when you dropped Ollie off on Sunday. We both know the only reason we’re having this conversation is because you saw Haiden here. This has nothing to do with Ollie and everything to do with you not liking the thought of another man living here.”

  “Too damned right, I don’t. We don’t know anything about him.”

  “Yes, we do. He’s been vetted by the university housing. And he’s good with Ollie, too. But even if he wasn’t, this is still none of your business. I have parental responsibility over Ollie, and unless there was some real reason why another man couldn’t live here, then I could have as many men living here as I choose. This is my life, Stephen, not yours. You’ve gone off and lived yours, however the hell you wanted, without consulting me once, so don’t think you get to say what happens in my life.”

  She stopped and took a shuddery breath, her hand on the kitchen worktop to steady herself. She needed to remember this all affected Ollie as well. He was always going to be number one to her, even above her own emotions, and she needed to think of that now.

  “Listen to me, Steven. If you genuinely want to see Ollie more often, I’m not going to stand in the way of that. You’re his dad, and that will never change. I never want to be the kind of mother who gets in between the son an
d his father simply because I think the father is a piece of shit.”

  She heard Stephen’s sharp breath. “That’s a bit harsh, Kristen, don’t you think?”

  “Actually, no, I don’t,” she replied, “but here we are. If you want to start having him every weekend instead of every other weekend, then we can work with that. But you turn up when you say you’re going to, and you don’t let him down.”

  There was silence on the other end.

  “Stephen? Are you still there?”

  “Yeah, I’m here.” His tone had grown hard. “So, what you’re saying is you want Ollie out of the house every weekend.”

  Kristen gaped. “No, I’m saying this in response to the letter you sent me from your solicitor. You said you wanted Ollie more often.”

  “Yes, but not just so you can have private time with a boy young enough to be your son.”

  She laughed at the absurdity of his words. “Haiden is in his twenties. I would have been a child myself if I’d had him.” Kristen tried to bring herself back to the topic at hand. This wasn’t about Haiden. This was about access to Ollie. She took another breath and tried again. “If you don’t want Ollie at the weekends, are you saying you want him during the week? That would be crazy. You live on the other side of the city and have to get another child to school and get to work yourself. How do you plan to get Ollie into school as well?”

  “He could always change schools. He could go to the local one with Lisa’s daughter.”

  “And then when am I supposed to see him?”

  “Maybe you should be the one who has him at the weekends.”

  She felt like someone had just ripped out her guts. He was talking about Ollie mainly living with him and Lisa. She didn’t want that at all. The idea of spending all week without Ollie was heart-breaking—not getting up in the morning and making his packed lunch, and getting his little school uniform on, and kissing him goodbye when she dropped him off at breakfast club. The thought broke her heart.

  “I’m not having this conversation with you anymore, Stephen,” she said curtly. “I’m not going to uproot Ollie just because you’re jealous of a student staying here. He’ll be gone in a few weeks, anyway, and then what are you going to do? Just move Ollie back here again? This whole thing is ridiculous.”

  Her hand was shaking as she ended the call. Trembling with adrenaline and sick at the idea of losing her son, she stared down at the phone in hatred. With a scream, she threw the phone down. “You fucking bastard!”

  She winced at the crack of the phone hitting the floor. She’d thrown it too hard. Picking the phone back up, she saw the screen was cracked, and it had turned itself off. Shit, shit, shit. She couldn’t afford to have a broken phone right now.

  Kristen pressed the button to turn the phone back on again, and miraculously, the screen flashed to life.

  She exhaled a sigh of relief. There was nothing she could do about the crack, but at least it was still working. For the time being, anyway.

  Chapter Fourteen

  “Nancy!” she exclaimed as she opened the door to find the woman from the university housing on her doorstep.

  Haiden was staying late at the university that day, so wasn’t back as normal. Kristen had finally got around to getting him a key cut so he could come and go as he wanted.

  She frowned, suddenly worried. “Is everything all right?”

  “Yes, fine. I’m sorry to just turn up like this. I wanted to have a quick chat and see how you were getting on. I’m aware this is your first student stay.”

  “Oh, of course. Come on in. Would you like a cup of tea?”

  “Yes, please. That would be lovely.”

  Kristen led her through into the kitchen. She was aware of how Nancy was glancing around, taking in everything. Was she suspicious of something? Heat crept up Kristen’s chest as she thought of the moments with Haiden where she’d felt like something had passed between them. Had Haiden said something to the student housing about her? Had she done something inappropriate and now Nancy was here to have a little chat with her? God, she would be mortified.

  Trying to hide her discomfort, she went to the kettle and busied herself with filling it with fresh water and taking cups down from the cupboard.

  She couldn’t put it off any longer. The suspense was killing her.

  “So,” she said, turning to face Nancy, “what sort of things did you want to chat about?”

  She forced a smile and wished she didn’t feel so God-damned guilty. It wasn’t as though she’d done anything wrong, had she?

  “I did have a reason for coming here, actually,” Nancy replied.

  Kristen’s mouth ran dry, her pulse racing. “Oh?”

  She quickly turned and took the teabags out of the mugs and stirred in a little milk. Hoping her hands weren’t shaking, she picked up the mugs and carried them over to the table and set them both down.

  “I didn’t want to look like I’m interfering,” Nancy continued, pulling the cup of tea towards her, “since Haiden is a grown man and can do whatever he wishes, within reason, but I just wondered if he’d mentioned falling out with his parents.”

  Kristen frowned. “His parents? No, not at all. In fact, he says they’re close.”

  Nancy pursed her lips. “Hmm. Yes, that’s what they told me, too. I probably shouldn’t even be getting involved, considering he’s twenty-three years old, and family issues really shouldn’t be a part of our concern. But of course, things like this can affect a student’s ability to concentrate.”

  She lifted a hand to stop the other woman. “I’m sorry, but I think I’m missing something. Things like what, exactly?”

  “Oh, it’s probably nothing, but Haiden’s mother emailed the office to say she hasn’t managed to speak with Haiden since he left. He’s sent them text messages to let them know he’s fine and everything is going well, but whenever she tries to call, he never answers, and he’s made no attempt to call home either.”

  “Right... that’s strange.”

  A wave of relief washed over her. This wasn’t anything to do with something she might have done or said.

  “I mean,” Kristen continued in a rush, “I’ve heard his mobile phone ringing on occasions, but I didn’t really think anything of it. Maybe he’s just really busy and hasn’t had time to talk.”

  Lines appeared between Nancy’s eyebrows, and she pressed her lips together. “That is what I told his mother as well, but she insisted it was really out of character for him not to call and speak to them all.” She threw her hands up in the air. “But there’s nothing we can do about it. If he doesn’t want to speak to his mother, it’s not like we can force him. He’s not a child.”

  Kristen pulled a face. “Sorry I can’t be of more help.”

  “You’ve been more than helpful. It’s not as though we expect you to get involved with the personal lives of the students, though obviously, if you have any concerns, then don’t hesitate to contact us.” She leaned in closer, her head tilted slightly to one side. “You don’t have any concerns, do you?”

  “No, none at all. Haiden’s been a pleasure to have around.” She clamped her mouth shut, not wanting to say anything more. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing and ruin everything. If she said he stayed up in his room all the time, and didn’t get involved with their family life, they might think him to be overly withdrawn and that she hadn’t made enough of an effort to get him involved. But if she told the truth about how it felt like they’d become their own little family in the matter of a week, and that she was already dreading him going, she didn’t think that would go down too well either.

  “Right, well, I’d better be off,” Nancy said. “If you do hear anything you think we might need to know about, please, just give me a call.”

  Kristen noticed how she’d barely touched her tea, the drink still steaming hot. “Sure.” She thought of something. “Should I mention to Haiden that you were here? Or that his parents want to hear from him?”

&n
bsp; Nancy flapped a hand, the blue nail varnish on her nails chipped and tatty. “No, no need. We wouldn’t want him to think we were spying on him, and we’ve already let him know his parents want to hear from him. Hopefully, he’ll just pick up the phone and everyone can stop worrying.”

  She hadn’t been worrying, but now she wondered if perhaps she should be. What possible reason could Haiden have for not wanting to speak to his folks? Not that it was any of her business, of course. She hoped Ollie would still want to speak to her in twenty years, when he was fully grown and off doing exciting things. Her mind flashed forward twenty years, and the idea of a woman in her thirties who already had a son and an ex-husband having her eye on Ollie jumped into her head. She’d be furious and would make sure the other woman knew to keep her hands off her boy. Could that be part of the reason Haiden hadn’t called his family. Did she have something to do with it?

  SHE WAS RELIEVED WHEN the working week came to an end.

  To her surprise, Stephen came to pick up Ollie, stating that he’d have him for an extra night this weekend considering he’d missed the Friday night the week before. Ollie seemed happy enough to go off to his dad’s, and he bounded off with Stephen, chatting about his day as happily as ever. She hoped he was going to be able to sleep all right that night, and she wouldn’t have more issues with Stephen complaining. He hadn’t even mentioned the letter from the solicitor when he’d come to pick him up, but still that niggle of worry wiggled around inside her.

  What if he was going to take Ollie and refuse to bring him back again? What if he fed poisonous thoughts into Ollie’s head about her—maybe even making him think she was replacing him with Haiden?

  But she could only assume from Stephen’s change in demeanour that the things she’d said to him on the phone about how impractical it would be for him to take Ollie during the week had actually got through his thick skull. She hoped he’d also accepted what she’d said about how unreliable Stephen was, and how there was nothing between her and Haiden and only had him staying because of the money. She doubted this momentary truce would last, however.